Alright. So I fixed my phone but apparently it was the duct tape variety of fix because it petered out on me again. Rebooted itself 3 times when I was trying to call someone last week, resulting what must have appeared on caller ID to be a psycho move.

I conceded. It was time to get help.

I zipped over to my non-neighborhood T-Moblie store with time I really didn’t have to spare and copped a ‘tude with the boy behind the counter trying to eat his pizza dinner…as only I can. If you’ve witnessed me getting to this point, you know exactly what I’m talking about and you feel really sorry for the guy and embarrassed for me. You also know that by the end of it I was fine and I had him smiling.

So my new/old phone arrived yesterday and when I swapped my SIM card I realized I was screwed, yet again. The worst part: it wasn’t even good for me. WHY can’t they program those stupid things to hold on to my address book? I imagine this will involve another visit to my new boyfriend…we’ll call him Mr. T (for T-Mobile, get it?).

Duck and cover, my friend.

In other news, my tusks are clean, my hair is cut, I have my final vaccination (for when I run away to South America), and, most importantly: I’m too sexy for my socks with Birkenstocks. Yeah c’mon.

feet ala Techwood “non-office”

Loosly related open letter to Santa - this is what I’d like for Christmas this year. I’ve been both naughty and nice, that’s got to be worth something.

Posting this early in honor of the fact that by the post time [shown] I’ll actually be on the way to the dentist to have my fangs sharpened and shined.

The holiday spirit is sneaking up on me in the form of a massive sugar high. Taaaaaaaaaaaasty treats, and a recipe (via Amy) so simple even I can make them.

1 stick butter
1 c graham cracker crumbs
1 c chocolate chips
1 c butterscotch chips
1 c flaked coconut
1 c evaporated milk
1 c chopped pecans

- Preheat oven to 350.
- Melt margarine, mix with graham crackers and spread in 9 x 12 pan
- Add a layer of chocolate chips, butterscotch chips and coconut
- Cover with milk, then (optional) nuts
- Bake 30 minutes
- When cool, cut in squares

That must be wonderful: I don’t understand it at all.
-Molire

Last night: visiting a friend in New York.

We’re in her brownstone, but my current downstairs neighbors are her upstairs neighbors. I left my backpack on the beach (it was a tropical beach, don’t ask me) overnight. Drove with her boyfriend to go back for it, even though I’d just walked there (it was shorter to walk) and forgot it because the beach turned into Central Park and I had to take pictures of tourists.

Ran into Billy Mazoch along the way (a kid from middle school) and shot the breeze for a few minutes. The roads were like LA roads, but 8-lane surface streets with crazy merging to be done.

Get back to the brownstone and the neighbors are missing. There’s a report on the news that matches their description. We look through their place for clues (open doors, more of a house than apt type brownstone) and when we’ve just about given up on trying to figure out why they left the bathtub full of suds, they come in. Instead of the usual dark garb, they have on pastels and are tan. They’ve just come back from Hawaii where they were married.

Cut to: crowded room and big hair. High school reunion. Even I have big hair, which never happened. Long, too. My dress is too small, too tight, and a color I would never wear. The friend I arrived with disappears to socialize and I’m left with a boy, making awkward conversation. Eventually two other friends show up and we hop up and down so much that we fall over.

Then I woke up.

Unrelated –

Texas Hold ‘Em report from last night: Kyle goes all in against Maigh, first out. Jonathan goes all in against Baldie, second out. Three fingers goes all in against Anderson, third out. Maigh has dwindled her fortune and goes all in under duress, fourth out. Anderson claims the title of come-back kid after going all in 4 times and slowly stealing Baldies piles and piles of chips. Anderson takes home the pot, seriously confused as to what just happened.

Disclaimer: day 5 - now without a net.

Why is it speed is nearly everywhere you don’t want it to be, and nowhere you do?

Summer never arrives quickly enough, and winter lasts too long. Dentist visits drag on and on, plane trips seem endless, waxing — an eternity. Traffic, the line at Starbucks…forever. The answer to the magic question, the apology you need to hear - will never arrive. The absence of speed.

Conversely, the days, weeks, and months of the year fly by. Your personal odometer flips, seemingly in rapid succession though truly with 365 days in-between. Children bloom before your eyes and sadly, in the space between visits. Evenings with friends, family, loved ones blaze by. Nights fall in fast-forward cycles, scarcely allowing you the opportunity to soak in the sky and the stars before the sun looms and forces you back to routine life. Firsts, of any kind, come and go so quickly it stings.

All this, balanced out and healed easily by one day of wall to wall sunshine in the mountains or on the beach with fresh air and conversation optional.

***

Answer to last night’s trivia after trivia question: 55 yesterday.