Sure, some people might call it mania, I call it productivity.
In the last 36 hours, I’ve:
– Completed my taxes
– Mailed my siblings Christmas presents (with Valentines Day cards inside)
– Renewed my domain name for another two years (how has it been 6 years already?)
– Watered my plants (a day late)
– Cleaned Grover’s bowl (do you know how stinky those things get?)
– Ordered new checks for the first time since 2003
– Gone to bed early two nights in a row, finishing another trashy detective novel in the process, sleeping with the window open and waking to birds
Ok, so it might not look like much but sandwiched between 9 hour work days, commuting (ok, that takes 20 minutes round trip), and the endless errands of a singleton, it feels good to have that crap done.
For what its worth, you married and co-habitating folk take for granted how nice it is to have someone to share chores and errands with. Need something from the store? Call your sweetie on their way home. Dry cleaning? Call your sweetie. Someone to take the blame for the trash overflowing and the dishes piled in the sink? Sweetie! Bleh.
It’s not as hard when you’re a twenty something and you’ve never had it, as it is as a thirty something having to relearn to juggle life on your own again. It’s as though you’re suddenly far less efficient than you once were. It can feel like you’re walking in molasses and you catch yourself wondering what the hell is wrong with you and why you aren’t able to accomplish as much as you could just a few months ago. You look for signs of disease or mental defect and then realize “oh yeah, that guy. He’s missing?”
Ah don’t get me wrong. I have more good days than bad, and the truth is it’s been a few years now and I rarely think of it at all. If I do it’s a short thought where I give thanks for my freedom, for the lessons learned that I can move forward with.
Isn’t that always the way? When we’re finally able to have that one, solid, good and healthy adult relationship, it’s because we’ve had to endure and learn from the bad ones along the way. The things that once hurt can be the same things that help make you whole.